Wednesday, May 4, 2011

I'm THAT woman.

All I can talk about is being pregnant and having a baby. Ugh.

But wait--is that bad? I'm sure its annoying for most people, but isn't a woman's ability to be ultra-communicative a prized evolutionary trait? In general talking about personal experiences, especially ones as terrifyingly beautiful as pregnancy and birth, help people to learn from one another and create bonds. And we know how I like to bond. People like to bond. We are social animals after all.

In the words of Audre Lorde: "I have come to believe over and over again that what is most important to me must be spoken, made verbal and shared, even at the risk of having it bruised or misunderstood."

So this brings me into a whole other realm of my woman-ness. I struggle sometimes with my femininity, feeling as though I am not feminist enough if I love makeup and skirts and my hubby opens doors for me. And for me, being pregnant is the most feminine thing I could be doing right now.

We could of course get into the whole gender binary that our society has constructed: feminine=bad (weak, sensitive) & masculine=good (strong, stern) and how this association poses a huge problem for us critical thinking folks. I can be super-girly. And that's bad, right? Or am I just another victim of our patriarchal society, giving into these preposterous, antiquated notions of gender expression? Because we all know that the patriarchy is really just jealous that women can create a new person AND feed it, all with our own bodies and a semen donation, and that the world would be a different place if men did the childbearing.

THEN I take a deep breath and remember that feminism is about CHOICE. Not just the choice of deciding whether or not to have children (though that's a big one) but the choice of whether to wear makeup or not, to have a career or be a full-time mom (which is a career of its own), to marry or not to marry, to have sex or not to have sex and with whom, and so much more.

So this is my choice. To get knocked up and raise a family as a working mom with my wonderful feminist hubby. And to talk about it as much as I want. :)

1 comment:

  1. Yep, you are totally annoying right now to everyone with the bub talk...but embrace it, because it really is amazing.