Thursday, May 5, 2011

Marsupial Envy

Just think--what would the world be like if humans had evolved to have pouches like marsupials? Answer: complete awesomeness. Both women AND men could carry infants hands-free, as well as other items like groceries, snacks, wallets, etc. Plastic bags would be non-existent and the environment would be better off.
But then you gotta wonder: would some pouches become "sexier" or more desirable than others? What kind of random products would be invented for them? I can picture it now:

  • "Got stinky pouch? Well worry no more! Introducing Pouche Douche! Pouche Douche comes in four different scents and is perfect for all of your pouch needs."
  • "Tired of your stretched-out pouch? Dr. Roo is the pioneer of poucheplasty, specializing in tightening and firming those saggy and slouchy pouches. It's the new cure for the mother in your life!"
Oy. You get the picture. Still, I envy kangaroos (minus the whole three vaginal canals thing, but that's another story) and their nifty pouches! Instead, I have to find a baby carrier that will cost an arm and a leg. Yuck.

1 comment:

  1. I wondered how long it would take for you to mention kangaroos :) I love it.